Nothing was where it was supposed to be.
    “There ought to be a bloody great mountain in front of us and it isn’t there,” I declared. “And the ridge should run away from us to the east and it doesn’t.”
    “That’s because you’ve brought us to the wrong fuckin place, dickwit,” Duffy snarled.
    The other two men hung their heads in shame and looked everywhere else.
    Plainly it was my problem to solve and when I opened the map all the way out in desperation, an idea came.
    The tree under which we sat was different to the rest of the forest. Rather than being a tall straight eucalypt, this was a pine tree, old and gnarled, its seed blown in on a cyclone no doubt from some very distant plantation centuries ago. And that meant it could easily be climbed. Up I went.
    “You can’t hide up there,” Duffy yelled from below.
    High up in the canopy, I was finally able to poke my head out and view the surrounding terrain. East of us the land flattened out, and then turned to the glistening blue waters of the Pacific Ocean. The yellow beach divided one blue from the other, broken in places by the skyscraper hotels. And these, some splendid cartographer, had indicated on the army ordinance map. I took a bearing on the Broadbeach Hotel, which was the only one I could recognise, and then on the jetty at Southport, which was all too prominent.
    I descended in jubilation and using a rifle barrel as a long ruler, drew the lines on the map. Where they intersected was where we were. Only about three hundred metres off course.
    “We follow this ridge over the next rise and we’ll be there.”
    “I’ll tell ‘em that you fuckin cheated,” Duffy muttered in disgust.
    “They’ll call it initiative,” I gloated. “Probably make me an officer.”
    None of those things happened.

She’s beautiful, and therefore to be woo’d;
She is a woman, therefore to be won.
    This might be the first bit of genuine Shakespeare ever written, when he first came to London as a young actor and was taken on by Christopher Marlowe and others as apprentice playmaker. Since he repeated these lines in several of his later plays, it is best that we believe that he made them up himself.
    The three parts of Henry VI are the first material that he is known to have been involved with, but probably only in a very minor way. The First Part of King Henry VI was always considered the work of a team of writers, and generally it is thought that only Scene 3 in Act 2, much of Act 4 and Scene 3 in Act 5 are the Bard’s contribution. The play—fairly accurate historically anyway—existed long before him. And certainly nobody wants to think that he might have been responsible for the embarrassingly bad portrait of Joan of Arc.
Shakespeare Scoreboard:
Original plays: 2. (MacBeth) (Henry IV Part One)
Plays ripped off from contemporaries:   5. (Merchant from Marlowe’s Jew of ) (Hamlet from Kyd and Aeschylus)(Antony and Cleopatra--everywhere) (Julius Caesar—same place) (Romeo and Juliet from Brooke’s Romeo and Guilietta)
Contributed part only: 1 (Henry VI Part One)